I’m Worried I Can’t Control My Anger, When Should I Get Help
You do not need to wait until anger has caused a crisis before asking for help.
You do not need to wait until anger has caused a crisis before asking for help.
If you are repeatedly frightened by the strength of your reactions, people around you are becoming afraid, relationships or work are being damaged, or the things you try yourself are not working, it is reasonable to seek professional support.
The NHS specifically advises seeing a GP if you are struggling to cope with anger, self-help is not helping, or you are acting in an abusive or violent way.
Take patterns seriously before the next incident
Look honestly at what has already happened.
Are outbursts becoming more frequent or intense? Have you threatened somebody, broken things, driven aggressively, become physically violent or frightened people close to you?
Previous incidents matter because they show that the problem is no longer only an uncomfortable feeling.
Do not rely on promising yourself that next time will somehow be different without changing anything.
Write down the pattern while you are calm
A simple record can help you explain the problem to a GP, counsellor or other professional.
Note what tends to happen before anger escalates, your early warning signs, what you do, what helps you de-escalate and what the consequences have been.
NICE guidance on violence and aggression emphasises understanding triggers, early warning signs, context and de-escalation approaches that have helped before.
What kind of help might be available?
Your GP may discuss what is contributing to the anger and whether other mental or physical-health issues need attention.
Depending on local services and your circumstances, support might include counselling, cognitive behavioural therapy, an anger-management programme or another appropriate mental-health service.
You do not need to decide the correct treatment before asking for help.
If you are worried you might hurt somebody
Treat that concern seriously.
Move away from confrontation where it is safe to do so, avoid adding alcohol or drugs to an already volatile situation, and seek urgent professional help if you believe somebody may be in danger.
If there is an immediate danger or life-threatening emergency, call 999 or go to A&E.
Safety takes priority over finishing the argument.
Getting help is not the same as excusing what happened
Professional support can help you understand triggers, emotions, beliefs, communication and ways to interrupt escalation.
It does not transfer responsibility for abusive or violent behaviour to stress, another person or a diagnosis.
Change usually starts with being able to describe the behaviour accurately enough to work on it.
Last reviewed
6 September 2026
Important anger and mental health information
This guide provides general information only and is not a diagnosis or a substitute for professional medical or mental-health advice. Anger is a normal human emotion, but persistent or intense anger can sometimes be linked with stress, difficult experiences, physical health, hormones, mental-health difficulties or other factors.
Feeling angry is not the same as behaving aggressively or abusively. Anger does not make threatening, frightening, controlling or violent behaviour acceptable. If you are worried that your behaviour is hurting or frightening other people, seek appropriate professional support.
If anger is persistent, feels difficult to control, is damaging relationships or work, or is having a significant effect on your wellbeing, speak to your GP, counsellor or another appropriately qualified mental-health professional.
If you or somebody else is in immediate danger or there is a life-threatening emergency, call 999 or go to A&E.