I Don’t Know Where to Start
Sometimes the hardest part of asking for help is not admitting that something is wrong. It is working out what kind of help you need.
Sometimes the hardest part of asking for help is not admitting that something is wrong. It is working out what kind of help you need.
You may know that you are not coping as well as usual but have no diagnosis, no clear explanation and no idea whether you should speak to a GP, a counsellor, a practical advice service or somebody you trust.
You do not need to solve that question before you begin. The first useful step is often to identify what is making life hardest right now.
Start with what is happening, not what to call it
You do not need to decide whether you have anxiety, depression or another mental-health condition.
Ask simpler questions.
What has changed? What are you finding difficult? Is it sleep, worry, motivation, concentration, work, money, relationships, grief, illness or several things at once?
NHS guidance recognises that low mood, anxiety and stress can be connected with practical life events including work, family, money, illness and bereavement. Understanding the pressure can help identify the kind of support that may be useful.
Choose one doorway
When everything feels connected, trying to fix everything at once can stop you starting anything.
Choose one doorway.
If the main problem is how you are feeling, a GP or talking support may be useful. If debt is driving the distress, debt advice may be an important first practical step. If work is the problem, you may need information about your options as well as emotional support.
The first doorway does not have to be the only one.
You do not need a diagnosis to ask for support
In England, NHS Talking Therapies can accept self-referrals for anxiety and depression, and the NHS states that you do not need a diagnosed mental-health condition to refer yourself.
A GP can also be a useful starting point if you are unsure what support is appropriate, if your symptoms are affecting daily life or if you want to discuss your mental and physical health together.
Write down what you want help with
If talking feels difficult, make a short note before contacting anyone.
Try completing these sentences:
“The biggest thing affecting me is…”
“It has been happening for…”
“It is affecting my sleep/work/relationships/daily life by…”
“What I would like help with first is…”
You do not need to tell your whole life story in the first conversation.
Different problems may need different kinds of help
Emotional support cannot remove an unaffordable debt. Benefits advice cannot treat persistent anxiety. A solicitor cannot provide counselling.
Sometimes the most effective support is a combination: practical information for the problem and mental-health support for what living with it is doing to you.
That is why the MH360 Knowledge Library is organised around both how you feel and what is happening in your life.
Make the first step deliberately small
Your first step could be booking a GP appointment, completing a talking-therapies self-referral, reading one relevant guide, telling somebody you trust or making one practical advice enquiry.
You are not committing yourself to an entire treatment plan by taking one step.
You are gathering information about what might help next.
Last reviewed
6 September 2026
Important informationThis guide provides general information only and is not a diagnosis or a substitute for professional healthcare advice. If difficulties with your mental health are persistent, worsening or affecting everyday life, consider speaking to your GP or another appropriately qualified healthcare professional.